Are You Really Ready For A Relationship?
Deep down, all of us secretly desire for someone to love us whole-heartedly, to be with us through our tough times, to cheer us up and to go through this journey of life together.
Sometimes, when we feel lonely, we often feel that we are ready for a relationship, that we are finally ready to let someone into our lives.
That’s where we are wrong.
Being in a relationship is not as simple as being ready to accept someone into our lives.
Instead, perhaps we should ask ourselves these questions:
1. Are we ready to love someone the way we expect them to love us?
2. Do we have the capacity required to love someone else wholeheartedly on top of fulfilling our own emotional needs?
BE READY TO GIVE & LOVE
A relationship is a two way street which requires couples to have the capacity to love each other unconditionally.
If we go into a relationship only prepared to receive love but not to give love, we will have nothing to offer our partners other than our “neediness”, and that’s where we might run the risk of unknowingly transforming into a demanding, jealous, insecure or over-protective partner.
Just as we want our partners to be secure and confident about themselves and have the capacity to love us, we should also strive to be such a partner for them. Only then will we be able to have a healthy and constant exchange of giving and receiving love from each other.
MAKE SURE YOUR LOVE TANK IS OVERFLOWING WITH LOVE
All of us have a love tank within us.
It is like a car’s petrol tank, it gets fuelled up when we receive love & encouragement from our family or friends, when good things happen to boost our confidence or when we are spiritually fulfilled.
However, it also depletes easily as bad things happen every day.
To be ready for a relationship, we will need to find ways to build our self-esteem, confidence or find reliable sources of love from ourselves, our family, God or any spiritual or internal means to keep our love tank filled so we will have more than enough love for ourselves and to share and give with someone we love.
That way, we will truly be ready to love someone.
But of course, we are all still human after all, and it is not easy to constantly have an overflowing love tank. However, that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t strive towards that to be a better lover and a more ready lover.
A SIMPLE TEST TO KNOW IF YOU ARE READY FOR A RELATIONSHIP
Here are a few simple questions that we should ask ourselves to get an idea on whether we are ready for a relationship.
- Am I still in love with an ex-partner?
- Do I like the person that I am?
- Do I feel lonely and desperate?
- Am I feeling resentment?
- Am I unwilling to talk about my feelings?
If your answer is NO to all the above questions except No.2, then you are probably ready.
“Love is more about giving than receiving, if you go into a relationship only expecting to receive love and not to give, then you will have nothing to offer your partner other than your neediness….”